Sex Positions & Techniques
The best guide to sex and lovemaking on the Internet
Your Favorite Sex Positions!
We know more people have more sex in the missionary position than any other, and yet when you ask which sex positions people like best they never put the missionary at the top of the list! Here are the results of one survey.
Perhaps not surprisingly, rear entry and woman-on-top are men's favorites. The missionary comes in at number 4. The top two favorites for women are woman-on-top facing towards the man, and woman on top facing away from the man. The missionary comes in at number 5.
Why is this? Maybe when men and women describe their favorite positions, they are thinking of their favorite fantasy positions - the ones which excite them most in their minds when they masturbate, perhaps. Or maybe we just like to have a regular staple for sex (the missionary) backed up by a few more exciting ones to spice things up from time to time. Or maybe the missionary really isn't the most exciting, but it's easier on the body (especially the knees and back) than most other positions. Who knows?
But even though the missionary can be delightful, because it allows the couple to look into each other's eyes and gives good bodily contact, a woman's hip thrusts can be a bit restricted, so she may find she cannot move as much as she would like. Also, her clitoris may not be stimulated enough to give her an orgasm, and she may remain frustrated unless the couple make sure she comes through oral sex before or after penetration.
Sex Advice For Men and Women:
How To Enjoy New Sensations In Your Sex Life
The sensations of the woman vary according to the angle of the penis during intercourse. For example, you may use a sexual position in which the coronal rim of the penis, instead of rubbing against the roof of the vagina as it does in the face to face positions, rubs instead against the floor.
Since the face to face sexual positions are more often used in our culture, after some months of intercourse using mostly the face to face positions, the roof of the vagina becomes accustomed to the sensations produced by the penile rim. However, you can give the woman different penis-vagina sensations when making love in this way by deliberately moving the pressure of the penis more onto one of the other vaginal walls. To do this, you take up your usual position between your woman's legs, and when you have put your penis into her, you move one leg over to the outside of hers, and she grasps the leg which remains inside tightly between both of hers.
If you put your right leg outside her left leg, this pulls your penis over to the right, pressing it tightly against the vaginal wall on that side; while if you put your left leg over her right the opposite wall will come under pressure. In addition to pressing the penis against one of the vaginal walls, the penis is pulled 'out of straight' and lies across the vagina, so that while three-quarters of the shaft is exerting pressure on one vaginal wall, the head of the penis nudges gently into the rear section of the opposite wall. The combined effect of these two sensations is to produce feelings quite unlike any others you can get during intercourse in other sex positions.
If a man can last during sex for longer, the more he can prolong sexual intercourse before orgasm is reached. Even with only a moderate degree of control it should be possible for you to stay inside your woman between twenty minutes and half an hour, regardless of which sex position you are using.
Men who are in almost full control (a somewhat rare achievement!) - can prolong this period to an hour or an hour and a half. There is, however, one important point to remember: the woman should do nothing at all to stimulate you until she is herself well on the way to the point-of-no-return. As soon as she begins some form of stimulation on you, you should abandon your control and go along with her. The reason is that her increasing arousal will rapidly bring you to orgasm.
If you have a good degree of control, one recommended form of penis-stimulation of your woman can be carried out in the face to face, man on top sex position. The inner lips of the vagina are very sensitive to sexual stimulation - not as sensitive as the clitoris, but still very sensitive.
So when you have positioned yourself between your woman's legs, try putting only the head of your penis into her - which you do either by arching your back (a better approach) or lying rather lower down her than when you want to go for deep penetration - and make very short thrusting movements. This has the effect of rubbing the rim of the penis against the highly sensitive vaginal rim.
The only snag is that the softness of the vaginal ring can be so arousing as it rubs the nerves of the frenulum and glans that you come extremely quickly. In fact, you can bring yourself off more quickly by this means of stimulation than by any other. But if you have a high degree of ejaculatory control, it is more likely than not that you can bring your woman off just by doing this alone. In any case it will so increase your sexual arousal, that even if you can only keep it up a short time, your orgasm (and hers!) will be very intense.
Yet another way in which you can increase your woman's pleasurable sensations without advancing your own pace of arousal is by 'twitching' your penis after you have put it in the vagina.
The muscles used are those around the base of the penis inside the body, which involuntarily contract and relax several times as you climax and ejaculate, and by so doing squirt your semen out of your penis. In order to contract and relax these muscles voluntarily you will have to practice on them a bit: try to lift your testicles up towards your body by the use of these muscles alone. (You cannot actually lift the testicles upward; it will only feel like this is what you are doing.)
At first you will find their response weak, but if you practice using these muscles for two or three minutes every day, at the end of two or three weeks you will find that they will move strongly; after several months they will react under your control as strongly as they do when they make their involuntary contractions during orgasm. You can carry out these exercises when your penis is not erect.
When you have exercised them to maximum strength, you will find that if you stand upright while you have an erection and move the muscles, this movement will make the head of the penis jerk backward towards your belly in an arc of between half an inch to an inch.
The same jerking of the penis occurs if you put it into the vagina during sex in any position, and lying still, twitch the muscles. A series of these jerks can provide your woman with new and very stimulating sexual sensations.
A woman can develop control of the muscles surrounding her vagina in the same way. When she contracts them they have the effect of gripping the penis. If you make your contractions at the same time that she makes hers, the strength of the sensations is more than doubled.
Does Your Woman Always Want An Orgasm?
Occasionally your woman, after allowing you to arouse her sexually, feels that she does not want to have an orgasm. Sometimes it is enough for a woman to let you make love to her, help arouse you, and enjoy your ejaculation. She may simply not wish to go for orgasm on every occasion you make love.
When she does feel like this, and your relationship is one of mutual trust and love, she will let you know by saying something like "Don't wait for me, darling, I don't want to come." Though this may disappoint you, you should take her at her word, penetrate her and enjoy your own orgasm as soon as you can.
Finally, no matter how you arouse each another during foreplay, you probably enjoy sexual intercourse as a conclusion to your lovemaking. But consider other pleasures: mutual masturbation, simultaneous stimulation, successive orgasms through oral sex, and so on.
Simultaneous orgasm is a very wonderful experience, but it may not be that easy to achieve. Assuming that you can both achieve orgasm during intercourse, it's worth knowing that many women say that their orgasm sensations are much more intense if they climax first and their man does so about a half a minute to a minute later.
They say that though their orgasm has been intense, the final movements the man makes to reach orgasm and ejaculate, and the spurting of his semen inside the woman's vagina, can bring the woman's orgasmic sensations to a new peak.
Some women claim that they have a second orgasm, or if their initial orgasm has not been very intense, their sexual tension continues to build up very quickly into a definite second orgasm; and if the man takes two or three minutes to reach orgasm after she has done so, there may follow a third and even a fourth real orgasm for the woman.
Women who have considered themselves low in orgasmic response to stimulation have frequently discovered quite by chance, to their amazement and great delight, that they are capable of having multiple orgasms, the cumulative effect of which is much more intense than the effect of simultaneous orgasm.
My suspicion is that simultaneous orgasm is a fairly infrequent occurrence, and so my recommendation is not to strive after it, but when it does come about to accept it as an extra gift!
In my view the best arrangement is for the woman to climax first, and then the man, for these reasons. First, after a a man has ejaculated, the tip of his penis can be extremely sensitive, and if he tries to keep thrusting until his woman reaches orgasm during sex he may experience some physical discomfort.
Second, the penis, particularly in men with an average level of sex drive, often begins to lose its erection immediately after the last muscular spasm, so that it isn't of any use to the woman.
Third, by coming after the woman, he gives her the chance of having a multiple orgasm and thus gives her greater sexual pleasure.
Fourth, the woman's orgasm sensations and her arousal subside very much more slowly than the man's - he can continue thrusting after she has come without causing her any discomfort, even though she may have no second orgasm.
As your sexual experience increases, I am sure that you and your woman will discover many new positions for your pleasure. When you use lovemaking as an expression of your love, making an effort to keep your physical experience of sex fresh, reinforces your bond as a couple. If you treat sexual intercourse merely as a means of releasing sexual tension, it tends it be much less rewarding. Variation, and especially the use of new sexual positions and techniques, can keep your relationship fresh and exciting.