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Tantric Sex
The ancient Tantric texts made the
point that both men and women could exchange energy during sex - and that this
energy would nurture both partners. You may think this is a strange idea -
after all, isn't sex just about physical pleasure? No, it's also about
spiritual connection, and about the ability to exchange energy in more than
one way (i.e. not just through the union of penis in vagina and the energy of
ejaculation). Can we prove the reality of this sexual experience? The answer
is yes - you can manipulate your chi or Kundalini energy so that it flows into
and through your own body and that of your partner during sex. And here's
how....
The tongue is a vital part of the
mechanism or keeping energy flowing through the body. Some of the earlier exercises
describe this. If you place your tongue against the roof of your mouth, it
will complete the circuit so that energy flows through you in a loop: for men,
around the body, up the back and down the front of the body. For women, up the
belly and down the back. At the union point of penis in vagina the energy will
flow through you into the other's body. If the man visualizes the energy flow
out of his penis and into his partner's vagina - for example, imagine a
glowing bolt of blue energy leaving the head of your penis and flowing into
your partner's vagina - you can experience the exchange of energy directly.
But there are other ways of exchanging energy, which involve the tongue.
You can really experience energy
exchange when kissing. To be a good kisser is not only a romantic act, but an
aid to the psychic process whereby you exchange energy - and you can
consciously feel this process. You'll want to devote a lot of time to the art
of conscious kissing by which we mean putting your whole attention onto
the act of kissing, rather as though you were making love but doing it with
full awareness and attention. You can nibble, suck, lick, explore each other's
mouths and even lick your lover's face. You can suck your lover's tongue, and
as you do so you can imagine energy flow between you both at the level of your
mouths. It's also recommended that you try sucking each other's fingers -
which you will want to make sure are well-washed beforehand - so that you
extend your sexual experience in many different ways. Take this in turns
- have your partner suck your thumb then try sucking your partner's: see how
erotic you find it as he or she explores the different areas of your hand
between your fingers with their tongue or mouth.
Once you've developed a sense of
how exciting or arousing you find the exploration of your body and your
partner's body with your mouth and tongue, you can move on to the next stage
of the experience - which is to explore your partner's skin with your tongue.
You can explore the whole of your partner's body - it's an intimate
experience, and you can get to know the body of your lover very much better,
in addition to finding out more about what turns them on. You can locate the
erogenous zones that make sex much more pleasurable for them - these may
include elbows, toes, armpits, bottom of the feet, thighs, back, and many
other places which at the moment you don't even know about.
Of course, some of the areas which your partner
may find it exciting to have licked during sex will already be known to you -
nipples, navel, ears, forehead, genitals and so on. You can achieve more
interesting results if you do all this with your full attention on what you
are doing, not distractedly. You can even imagine energy (which is sexual
energy) flowing up from your pelvic region and out through your tongue into
your lover's body. More specifically, if you are a man, imagine it flowing
from your anus and your balls, up through your penis and out through your
tongue. If you are a woman, imagine this sexual energy flowing up from your
vagina and up through your breast to your tongue, then leaving your tongue and
entering your partner's body.
Make sure you visualize energy flow from your tongue in whatever way seems
appropriate - a lightning bolt of energy, or as tiny sparks. You may well find
that your partner really does respond as if they have received a jolt of
energy.
The ultimate skill here is to bring your lover to orgasm using only your lips
and tongue, all the while imagining the energy flowing out from your tongue
and lips into their genitals and anywhere else you touch them on the body with
your mouth. You can start the process by kissing passionately but with
feeling, using full awareness of your energy flow and visualizing the energy
moving between you and your partner in whatever way seems most appropriate.
When you bring your partner to orgasm, close your eyes and see if you have any
awareness of the energy flowing between you. For example, you may particularly
feel or perceive the energy moving up your spine or around your chakras -
especially your brow chakra. This is a reflection of Kundalini energy energy
moving up your spine from your genitals. You may also like to pay attention to
the tip of your tongue when you bring your partner to orgasm - you may be able
to feel an upswelling of energy there.
A variation of this practice is to bring your partner to orgasm with manual
stimulation - in other words, masturbate them to orgasm and as they reach
orgasm, kiss them so that your tongues are intertwined. See how that feels as
you bring your awareness onto the energy flow. Then have them do the same
thing to you and this time see how it feels to be on the receiving end of the
process. Kissing together after orgasm is also good practice, because it bonds
you to your partner, and keeps the sexual energy flowing.
A second variation is for one of you to bring yourself to orgasm while you
both kiss - and when he/she reaches orgasm, look deeply into each other's
eyes. This is a very intimate way of making love, and you may find it feels
like your soul is being bared! It's worth doing it just for the experience of
love and trust which it engenders - you may have heard of the idea that people
merge at orgasm; well, this is one way of feeling something that approaches a
soul union during sex.
And Don't Forget To Stimulate The Chakras!
Besides focusing on the genitals - which, in this belief system, means the
pelvic chakras - why not try some stimulation of the other chakras? So, for
example, focus on the heart chakra by playing with energy flow around the
chest and nipples - some women, as you may know, can reach orgasm through
stimulation of the nipples alone. You can pinch, suck, lick, tweak and rub
each other's nipples in as many ways as you can think of to get energy moving
during sex. If you have enough facility with the concept and practice of
energy flow, then you may achieve some surprising results - like an orgasm! If
you don't achieve an orgasm you can simply enjoy the physical pleasure.
If you want to try playing with the base chakra,
then a woman may insert a finger in to her partner's anus and massage his
prostate; or if she prefers, externally she can massage his perineum - the
area between his anus and his testicles. A man can insert one finger into his
partner's vagina and one finger into her anus and massage her perineum from
both sides. (Remember to wash well afterwards.) All of these experiences can
be very erotic and helpful in coming to understand and experience how energy
flows during sexual intercourse.
Two final ideas: follow the path which the
Kundalini energy reputedly follows during sex with your tongue. For a man,
this is from the perineum between his buttocks ad up his spine to the top of
his head, then back down across his brow and down the front of his body back
to the perineum. There is another dimension to the experience if the man is
masturbating as she does this. If you are a man doing this to a woman, then
follow the path of the energy from your partner's vulva up the front of her
body to her brow chakra, She can masturbate as you do this - it's great if she
can reach orgasm at the point where your tongue reaches her brow chakra, then
follow the path of the energy down her back to her vulva.
Next: The balance of Yin
and Yang during sex
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