Sexual Positions & Oral Sex
Some sexual issues around oral sex
The importance of good positions in your sex life
Sexual Positions & Oral Sex
During cunnilingus, to arouse your partner more, make her wait, and tantalize her by tonguing her pubic hair and with oral approaches along the pubic cleft to the clitoris, without actually getting there, except for a few preliminary flicks of the tongue-tip from moment to moment. This will serve to increase greatly her nervous tension and expectation, which are an essential part, perhaps one of the largest, in the sexual pleasure she feels and in her eventually reaching orgasm.
The opening of the vagina itself is one of the most highly sensitive portions of the woman's body, and should not be overlooked at this point. Some men insert the tongue-tip as deeply as they can into the vaginal opening, a penetration sometimes rather superficial owing to the restraining frenulum underneath the tongue, similar to that underneath the glans of the penis. This is really of no importance, as, if the gesture is intended to imitate the motions of coitus itself, it cannot succeed in doing so. It is more valuable to concentrate on the opening of the vagina, holding the tongue as deeply as possible in this, while moving the head circularly, or else licking circularly with the tongue-tip rather stiff, as though reaming or enlarging the vaginal opening. The opening of the urinal passage, about halfway up between the vaginal opening and clitoris, is usually quite small and often very sensitive to pleasure (though also easy to irritate).
All the circular motions just described are pleasing to the woman, but especially if they are alternately clockwise and counterclockwise, the man's head - and therefore the position of maximum labial and lingual pressure - rising higher and higher in the woman's vulva at every alternation of stroke, arriving finally at the clitoris. However, since greater speed of motion will probably produce greater pleasure (after the first few languorous turns), a side-to-side motion of the head is unquestionably the most effective. This can be done with extreme rapidity, more especially when done with a very short side-to-side sweep - the neck being held rigid and only the head moving, almost like quivering - than when done with a longer side-to-side sweep, the neck turning with the head. After a certain amount of experience, the man can do this with great rapidity, and also keep it up a surprisingly long time. However, be aware that persistent and prolonged attempts to bring a woman to orgasm in this way may backfire - a man is entitled to receive pleasure during cunnilingus too! The focus of pleasure on the woman may reflect a kind of performance oriented approach which is all too familiar to men.
The two elements of speed and direction of motion, and simultaneous power or relaxation of pressure, should be artfully intermingled. The erotic artist ranges from slow to fast, soft to violent, and strong to tender; building up crescendos of feeling as well as of speed, pressure, and direction of stroke on the organ used. Of particular value is a special type of mouthing, combined with suction and tonguing in which a whole mouthful of the vulva flesh - including, in particular, the upper inner side of the inner labia and the tissue surrounding the clitoris is taken into the mouth, and held there with a strong suction, is pressed and prodded as the tongue-tip against moves the tip or glans of the clitoris. Click here for more information. If you are a man who ejaculates too quickly, this may well be a technique that allows you to give your partner ample pleasure before you enter her.
The prime difference here is that in this type of cunnilingus the mouth does not move or slip over the surface of the vulva, but rather the vulva is seized orally, and shaken against the underlying parts and against the pelvic bones. A very similar manipulation can be used by the hand, pressing against the flat and open vulva, and shaking from side to side or around and around while simultaneously pressing deep against the underlying flesh, again without any motion over the surface of the vulva. It is precisely the transmission the motions here used - whether orally or manually - that give such excitement to a woman. Needless to say, such techniques are very useful for men who have premature ejaculation. They are described in Ejaculation By Command, a great program by Lloyd Lester. Click here for a complete review of Ejaculation By Command by Lloyd Lester.
Another exciting oral sex technique is the "Hummingbird" or "Butterfly": the vulva skin is pulled open tightly to make the clitoris stand out well, while the tongue frisks rapidly from side to side.
Pressure of the man's hand, pressing down firmly on the woman's pubis (after the preliminary toying and tracing over her pubic hair), is of enormous value during cunnilingus, and is obviously extremely simple to do simultaneously. The closer the woman comes to orgasm, the more she usually needs and appreciates such pressure, from the top of her pubis all the way to her anus and even beyond. It is for this reason that the woman will often lift her hips to force her vulva harder against the man's mouth, as her orgasm approaches, or try to clutch his head closer for the same purpose.
It should be noted, too, that while the
man is engaging in cunnilingus at the clitoris and the top of the
vulva generally, his chin can also easily exert a similar pressure
against the woman's labia majora and the highly sensitive opening of
her vagina, even including powerful motions of waggling the chin and
lower jaw-bone from side-to-side, alternately with motions of the
tongue higher up at the clitoris. The tongue motions and chin-waggling
cannot usually be done together, but their up-and-down alternation
gives a powerful and indescribable
sexual pleasure to the woman,
since it kind of matches the wish often expressed (by both sexes) that
a man could engage in both cunnilingus and intercourse with a woman at
the same time.