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the best position for you Sex positions for Tantric SexTantric sex is a concept that came to attention in the West quite recently. Most people think it's all about extending arousal, prolonging penetration and avoiding ejaculation. (The kind of position that's a bit like waiting for the plumber - you stay in all day and nobody comes.) But Tantra goes way beyond this. Imagine energy flowing around your body, through your sexual centres, into your lover then back to you. That's more what Tantra's about, though it's true that the ancient practitioners of Tantric Sex did think ejaculation was bad for a man: they believed it caused him to lose vital energy. So we can think of positions for Tantric Sex as being those that allow a couple to extend pleasure: positions that get sexual energy flowing, allow you to delay or avoid ejaculation, and generate extreme waves of pleasure or orgasmic bliss for both partners. If you want to know more about Tantra, you can find a lot of information on the internet. For example, check out: Source Tantra. The question that concerns us here is: "Which sex positions are most suitable for prolonging sexual pleasure?" Starting your Tantric arousalA good way to start developing Tantric sex is through gentle, stimulating touch. The idea is not to produce orgasm or even high levels of arousal, but to stimulate your awareness of your body and its energy flows. Start by stroking each other's arms and legs with a gentle touch, for say fifteen minutes. Then take a break before moving onto each other's back, chest, face and neck. Again, avoid each other's genitals. This touch is not explicitly sexual, and you can use any position you like, though lying down with one partner stroking the other one is easiest. Alternatively, you can sit up with your arms around each other, though this position may be tiring if you have any back problems. The next step is to spend thirty minutes or so stroking each other's breasts and genitals. Try and find as many ways to touch your partner as possible: that's to say, using different pressures, strokes and different parts of your fingers and thumbs. Again, the object is not to produce sexual arousal, so if a man's erection comes and goes during this phase of the process, that's fine. If you start to get bored, move beyond the boredom and focus your attention on your fingertips. Imagine every ounce of your sexual energy is focused at that point, and see it pouring into your partner's body. When you're on the receiving end, see if you can feel the energy coming from your partner's touch. Next, try and pass this energy between you from the man's penis to the woman's G-spot. Get an erection and have the woman life motionless on top of the man with his penis inside her. Try and feel the exchange of energy; in any event, stay in this position without having sex for as long as you desire, or until your erection subsides, whichever is the longer. Tantric Sex PositionsAs the aim of Tantric sex is to prolong arousal and focus on energy flow rather than rapidly thrusting till you ejaculate, you need a position which is comfortable, will allow the man to sustain his erection, and which does not provide too much stimulation. Man on top is not a good position for Tantric sex, since it is very tempting to thrust, it encourages deep penetration, and it is tiring on the man's arms (unless he's lying on top of his partner, which can be uncomfortable for her). And the muscle tension and strain which man on top promotes tends to speed up a man's arrival at orgasm. All the variations of rear entry, likewise, are not good for prolonging intercourse, since these positions both encourage deep thrusting and rapid ejaculation, as well as providing a very arousing view of his partner's rear for the man. As you've probably realized by now, that pretty much leaves side by side and woman on top positions as the most likely candidates for Tantric sex. Side by side is probably the best, for it allows eye contact, mutual caressing, touching, and gentle slow intercourse. To repeat: the objective of Tantric sex is to allow your arousal to build without necessarily tipping over into orgasm and ejaculation. It's the flow of sexual energy around and through each other's bodies which provides intense pleasure. Nonetheless, a certain amount of movement is needed to keep the man's erection hard and to stimulate the flow of energy during sex. A good way to do this is to have very slow sex: if you're the man, penetrate her vagina only an inch or two, then remain still inside her for a minute before withdrawing and resting the head of your penis in contact with your partner's clitoris. As you become more aware of the energy flow, you may actually feel it leaving your glans penis and flowing into her G-spot. Rest for half a minute then re-enter her. To encourage the energy flow, you can visualize the energy in whatever way seems most appropriate (blue light seems to work well). You may be surprised at the results when you do this: once your partner's G-spot is sensitized, she may begin to experience waves of bliss like energy flowing through her body. If you can intensify these waves of energy enough, and feed them back to each other, you may experience an ever-increasing level of energy flow which results in as vaginal orgasm for her. (It's often suggested that if you kiss the energy will flow back from the woman to the man through your entwined lips.) As she becomes more aroused, she may beg you to thrust, craving more stimulation of your G-spot. If you do, you'll most likely come quite quickly, which breaks the Tantric energy flow. An alternative is to stimulate her G-spot with your finger; if you use fast or firm pressure, an artificial lube will help to avoid soreness in her vagina. If, on the other hand, you can keep stimulating her G-spot with your penis without coming, you're likely to be heading for a massive orgasm yourself when you do eventually speed up and go for your orgasm. So, keep the very slow rhythm going for as long as you can, resting to let your arousal drop if you get too near orgasm. An alternative routine is to alternate deep thrusts and shallow thrusts - say one deep thrust for every nine shallow ones. In any event, once the woman has had her share of the vaginal energy flow, and it's the man's turn, he can speed up his thrusting and rapidly take himself to orgasm. If you're in a Tantric position, it's possible for the man to experience a long-lasting orgasmic energy flow rather like a woman's multiple orgasm, simply by continuing to thrust after he has ejaculated. Many men develop an extremely sensitive penis after orgasm, and think it too uncomfortable to continue trusting. But the discomfort actually dissipates quite quickly, and by continuing to thrust gently after you have ejaculated you may find that you move into a blissful multi-orgasmic state. Actually, it's not so much a multiple orgasm as a rolling wave of orgasmic energy which can continue for quite some time. Another link for Tantric Sex. And another. There are many more - you can easily find them for yourself by researching Tantra or Tantric Sex on Google. Body Electric is another organisation which teaches sensitive approaches to energy and the body. |